Antivirus – Is it what you think it really is?
Issued in public interest: The contents of this post are completely different from what you will read. Thus, read it only if you want to, the creator takes no responsibility whatsoever if you get confused or find it difficult to know what’s going on. In short, go ahead on your own risk. And if you are clever, you’ll know what it actually means!!!
Almost everyone has an Antivirus in their system. You ask them the reason for it, they’ll say that they need help and protection from potentially dangerous and unknown sources, and help you out when you get into trouble. They help in stabilizing the system and prevent it from crashing or malfunctioning. But I ask this: Do we really need an Antivirus? Can we rely on them? Can’t we do without them? I’ve observed that in most of the cases, they either tend to slow down the system as a whole, or lower the efficiency. Should we pay this cost for merely protecting ourselves from threats, when we can take preventive actions for the same? Is it really a necessity? Or we keep it just because everyone does? Perhaps because we don’t want to be left out. Well, see it from an entirely different angle today.
Lohe ko Loha kaat-ta hai, virus ko bhi virus hi kaat-ta hai. And a big one at that. It is a much bigger virus in itself, which can tackle other viruses and threats with the blink of an eye. Maybe it’s a Lice, which thrives on you, feeds on you, and all the time, it pretends to be your friend. Or maybe it’s a Dog. You give it space and all the love and trust that it needs, thinking that its your best friend, only to find that quite often it ends up biting the hand that fed it. It is very clever. Instead of repairing, it just gives you an option of deleting those files which someday, may prove useful for your system. And slowly and slowly, it takes away from you all the back-up you needed. It takes control over you. You cannot delete it from the system, it simply overpowers all processes and makes you do things its own way. And then you realize that you have become a slave, but its too late to press F1. You become vulnerable. Any rash step may lose all the valuable data, much of which may not be recoverable. So friends, think ten million times when you decide to get an Antivirus for your system, you may spell your own doom for yourself.
Enjoy…
The Smiling Assassins – Dwitiya
This post has taken a long time in coming. But better late than never. So without wasting much time, I’ll start with it as too much torture is not good for our readers. The two celebrities on the show today are Mrs. Ravana and Mr. Duryodhana. We’ll start with the former.
Mrs. Ravana tought us in the 3rd semester. Room F 101. The first day, she was five minutes late. We had no clue as to what sort of a creature will enter the premisis of the room. Will it be a real treat for the eye or will it be another six months imprisonment with a barbaric jailor. The answer we soon found out. It had to be the latter one because dear friends, we study in T.I.E.T. The first sight of this vintage piece was somewhat of a misadventure. I mistook her for a “Baayi” thinking she has come to say that your teacher has not come today. But when she stood by the table and said I’m your teacher for this subject, I started cursing myself as to why I chose this stream. Anyways, when she started teaching, we all found her a really nice LADY. Of course it was later that we found out she was infact a LADY-BUG. And a big one too. Since our classes were with CSE students, you can expect anything and everything. The one thing that used to happen in almost every lecture was a group of guys calling attendance for a poor girl. But one incident completely changed everything:
One fine day, this twin of a witch wore a sari in the lecture. The moment she stepped in, the CSE hooligans started whistling, hooting and shouting at the top of their voices. Trust me, you would have done the same for the scene was a bit too horrendous and harmful for normal eye. Her eyes a combination of red and yellow. A frame that would have brought the entire female community to shame. And I don’t want to remember her smile. It was like black magic. Give her a pointed hat and a broom. And lo behold! You have the star of “The Blair WITCH Project”. Now coming back to that sweet day, she started off in her usual fashion, giving us a lecture on how to behave. But the response she got made her even more mad. She said there’s hardly any difference between you people and dogs. Now you would think this would have made the CSE guys quiet. Bingo! Pin drop silence, except sounds of barking from the back benches. She put forward a resolution. She took attendance and said those who want to leave can go. Half class empty. And this was the scene everyday.
In liu of such fine behaviour, she rewarded us very suitably. I wont explain what she did but each and every student was sick of her. In lectures, she asked us if we have any problems. If noone said anything, she would hand pick students and ask them questions. And if some wise guy asked her something, we would come roaring at him, insulting him and saying that you are not attentive in the class.
Thank god I passed her subject with a B grade. The only good thing about it was that the subject was real interesting.
Now Mr. Duryodhana. He tought us in the fourth semester. Well, what can be said about him. He’s one Lean, Mean Killing Machine. I fail to understand why all the teachers keep a moustache. We’ve tried many fundas but all in vain. Anyways, coming back to him, I mentioned in my previous post about these assassins that there is a reason why I called him Mr. Duryodhana. Because his spouse’s name is Ramayana. Lol. He’s spectacled, well built, huge lips – reminiscent to a white African. He walks in a very interesting manner. Chiranjeev gave a very nice theory about it, contact him for details. And he talks as if his tongue has been bitten by an insect and he cant open his whole mouth while speaking. But the one thing he’s so popular for is his attitude. He possesses an evil mind with a complementing abusive tongue. For example once SS wore his army colored lower in his class, Mr. D said why have you come in a Pyjama. He replied all other trousers were not clean, to which Mr. D said in that case you shouldn’t have wore anything at all. And on 23rd March, Bhagat Singh’s martyrdom day, a few guys were wearing Kurta Pyjama. And he threw all of them out saying he’ll let them in only if they change their clothes. And his checking was very confusing. Gave full marks to one person and none to the other, even though the content was same. I passed his subject with great difficulty, with 12 absents in lectures and 4 in tutorials. And trust me, persons having even one attendance shortage were detained. I thank my stars I wasn’t one of them. And one moment needs special mention. On Saturnalia, he was holding his own child on his shoulders as a villager holding his lamb before sacrifice.
I have photographs of both of them, but deliberately haven’t posted them here because I don’t want to lose the few handful visitors to my blog. In fact, even I wouldn’t have the courage to open my own blog in that case.
Well, after bombarding their reputation in such a disgraceful manner, I would like to add that inspite of their rude and super arrogant behaviour, both of them were very good teachers with loads of knowledge about their respective subjects. They didn’t even took help of notes ever while teaching, which is very unlikely in T.I.E.T.
I think nearly all of my posts have been on the negative side. I’ll try writing a nice post now. Don’t know if it’ll come out to be good…….
The Dog Who Betrayed…..
Well, they say Dog is a man’s best friend... Its not true always, I found out the hard way… I had a dog in my life, who was supposedly my Best Friend, at some point of time. But this is just a fun post, so no hard feelings.
I know I had promised to write a post on Two Super Human personalities. But felt like writing this post first...
As you all know the thing with dogs - the more you feed them, the more they expect from you. The same happened to me. For four loooong years, this bloody dog remained with me as my friend, always expecting me to feed him, which I did. But I guess he didn’t watch “Teri Meharbaniyaan”. He had used me in whichever way possible. Although I didn’t expect anything from this dog, but I just have had enough with his doggy ways. I’ll jot down some of his traits….
1. Modest
This is perhaps the only dog on this planet who is ultra cocky about himself. For him, he’s the royal prince, whose orders everyone should obey. He’s possesses the highest IQ and can solve every problem in the world. Those who know him know what I mean.
2. Punctual
You wont find someone who values time more than he does. His watch is always 20 minutes ahead of IST. So you would expect him to be there well before time. And so you would. Only that you’ll find him entering class, 20 minutes before the class…. The NEXT class.
3. Down to Earth
He is very polite and cooperative to talk to. One cannot find someone more modest than him. All he can talk is Him, Him, and Him. Actually, according to his theory, 99.9% girls go gaga over him. After all, he’s the hunka-hunka guy…oops, dog I mean… He’ll tell tales of how girls follow him, call him and even propose him… Wow.. Lucky him, hehehe.
4. …………….
Could not find a suitable title. Well, he’s a day scholar and a hosteller. Don’t get confused, he has three houses in Patiala but still lives in a hostel. Obviously, his parents wont let him live alone in the house, God knows what this Dog will do when let loose.
5. @#&%!!&^*
His speech is so impressive. You’ll be left in awe. His English is so poor, even a beggar would speak better than him. He’s so cheap that he steals used practical files for doing his rough work. Don’t know if its rough or fair, both seem the same to me. And his knowledge!!! No comparisons. Wires connecting different hardware in a PC are know as Operating System.
After meeting him, you’ll find out why he’s the most generous, the most courteous dog. He wont empty his pocket for anything, for he never has anything in his pockets. You’ll find his wallet completely empty, with only an ATM card. If he has nobody to feed him, he’ll go to the ATM, get four rupees, take a lift from a cyclist, go and eat is toungue licking Hemburger. If I had kept count, then probably he owes me at least one thousand bucks.
I am sure you people are very keen to see what exactly this THING is. Well, all I can say is that if you are a Thaparian, just go to someone’s birthday party, you’ll find him there. No sir, his standards are not so low that he’ll eat leftovers and clean plates. He’ll be wagging his tail and eating human food for free. Well, that’s him.
And I forgot to mention one thing. His first and last love… MAGNETS
Confused??? Don’t be. Its simple. Magnets have two poles.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahaha
The Smiling Assassins
Well this post has been inspired by reading Daman and Suneet's blogs about their professors. So i decided why not write something about a few of our "Great Ones". But before i do, kindly pay your tributes to the great men and women who have survived these monsters. Who, in the face of adversity, stood their ground and defended their lives with everything they had. They are like those gallant soldiers who, in the line of fire, are attacked by their own general. And in the midst of all this, they will not lay a finger on him because of the respect they have for him.
Most of you have heard about the faculty of Electrical in Thapar. Trust me, they live up to those expectations very well. In fact, surpass them. The first one to teach me was SKJ in first sem. Although in the beginning he was the laughing stock of the class, he came back with a vengeance. Noone expected him to be so shrewd and manipulative. From being a bhola bhala sa gaon ka chhora to a thaparian-eating street mongrel, he could switch personality free at will. Anamagus, i suppose. Kachra kahin ka!!
In the third sem we had to face the wrath of two “Yoddhas”. One of them didn’t show up on his first lecture, other never took a single leave in the entire semester. You must have guessed them now. THE YKC and PSB. I’ll talk about them one at a time, they are two much two handle.
M/s THE YKC is a very graceful personality. THE Walks like a supermodel. And dresses like a waiter. He is a born genius, who entertains all the while. He is a very gifted personality. Teaching comes THE naturally to him. Those who have been taught by him know how correct I am. He never looses his temper in the classroom. But he makes sure he leaves THE no score unsettled. The evidence can be seen in the results. That is why he is the true smiling assassin. Poor Bhu even had a dream in which THE man detained him on attendance basis. Pity he wasn’t. But one characteristic of his needs a very special mention. His THE grammar. It is really one of a kind. Immaculate. He uses THE against almost every Noun, Verb and Adjective. And poor instru had to be with him for 5 hours on Thursdays. How THE enviable!!! He he.
Next in the line is the grrrreeeeaaaaat PSB, jiski goonj se saara room kaamp jaata tha. He was short, fat, strict but nice. Was a very punctual man, always on time. I’d like to mention a very nice incident with him. We all had decided to bunk his lecture because monkey had advised us so. All but four guys, including aloo and SS. PSB’s ego got hurt and he said that he will detain all those who bunked. But on seeing our innocent and harmless faces, he reduced our penalty and freed us for one whole week. We all were celebrating when we found out that our joy was short lived. Apparently, he told other assassins about our precious achievement and we could see a transition in their behaviour and probably our results also. We could feel the aftereffects in the next semester also. But you must be thinking how perfect this man is. Wait till you read further. He had an extraordinarily strong memory. He remembered every student by his name and face. Everyone except ****** (no pun intended). His lectures and tutorials were great fun. He always used to ask – “******, who is ******?”. AV don’t mind. Neways, who cares.
I wished I could tell you about two more assassins. But seeing the length of the post and the condition of the reader in mind, I guess I’ll write about them in the next post. The burden may be too much for our dear readers to take at one go. One of them is Mrs. Ravana and other is Mr. Duryodhana . Why I have used this comparison for the latter I’ll tell in next post. Be prepared (and armed if necessary) for that post... He he. Bye. Tc.
Life Ki Tension!!!
Hi. Long time, no see. Well, my bad days are going on and on. This training seems like a shraap. No respite, whatever we do. We bunked the weekend and i got a nice scolding from the AM as i came early on Monday. Others had a better luck. And adding insult to injury, Mr. Ya Ali ordered all four of us to segregate 5 packets of " MOVING CONTACT BACKUP SPRING ", each containing 5000 pieces. Very interesting job. Had to spend two days doing the same valuable job for our company. But finally we were let off when the other four packets got lost. Hehehehe. Hey, I didnt do anything..Maine kuchh nahi kiya yaar!! But i must say that our supervisor is quite a nice person. He got very impressed when i assembled an MCB(Miniature Circuit Breaker) in less than five minutes. (He didnt know we were tought this the very first day). Nonetheless, that doesn't take the credit away that i work very hard. He he.
Life's boring streak continues this week as well. The only saving grace was a visit to Dominos with family but i fainted when they handed the bill. Just a thousand bucks. I guess it'll take me quite sometime to go there again. Well, now that we have discovered almost every place in town, its hard to make out where to go. So we prefer to come home early nowadays. Yup, feels very wierd to be home at this time of the day. Normally i pass my time chatting with people. I guess i'll make a visit to Patiala this weekend. M dying to go home. Maybe watch Krrish with Sushi on Saturday. And i forgot to mention, i watched PHP twice. not as good as the first one, but paisa vasool. Anyways, I'll try to get as many cds as i can when i go home. Dont wanna waste a sec. And surely watch WC. Haven't seen a single match yet.
Dont know whats in store for us tomorrow at the company. But we all are very thankful that they keep Coffee Bite in the canteen. We all have at least three of them everyday. I think now we'll call this training "Sazaa-e-OILY paani" for most of the water coolers seem to have only oily water. We have to bring our own water bottles. Hehehe. Now i will take your leave, have to pass time as well. Gn. Bye...
Messed up!!
Today wasn't a good day. Started off when i slept the moment Brazil's match started. Then woke up late, got late for training. Once we reached training, we were sent to do the same pathetic job of sticking tape on cardboard sheets and arranging them. Bhu and i got ultra upset and went to assistant manager and told him we are not going to do this sort of stuff. He said ok. When we left his office i got Daman's message that someone had backbitched about him to all the girls. He thought it was me. I tried to find out what exactly had happened. It seems as if someone had messaged something very bad to the girls about him. He was very upset and depressed. Then i asked Suneet about the same thing. He said we all are very shocked about the incident. Hope we get to know who did it soon.
Now coming back to the company, we were assigned a project to reduce the rejection of RCCB's by studying them in detail and making a report also. When we left the company, we found nobody had any money. So had to leave for home. On reaching home i was told that we have to go to someone's house. But we left after one and half hour only. When we reached there, a huge mammoth monstruous man-eating dog was roaming free in the house. It sniffed me and started to bark which scared the hell outta me. Thank God his master came and took him else i wouldn't have been writing this blog. All in all, a very strange and depressing day. We thinking of bunking two days this weekend. Have to complete our "QUOTA" of 75% attendance. Maybe that will give us some respite from this RI.
Project Month Starts.
Hello.. Well today was the first day of our project month. We were assigned diff. departments. But we had to argue with the senior manager to make groups of two. Me and star in one, bhu and D in the other. The first day today was pretty vella. Just had to detect faults in circuits. and for a change, we decided to go home on time. he he. But on reaching home, the worst news i could get. NO CABLE CONNECTION TODAY. damn!! Could not watch world cup. The most important matches, of Aus, USA, Italy. Hope cable connection is there tomorrow. Cant miss Brazil's match at any cost. Obviously they are gonna win. Waise i read daman's earlier posts in which he has written very nice comments about me. He's a true friend indeed!!!
Waise life is quite boring here. In the company we have no freedom of geri. Just have to sit in one place, even if we are free. And not even allowed to go out. Man!!! If Thapar is central jail, then this is "Sazaaye - Kaala - Paani". Deepti ji started preparing for GRE. Star busy on cell as usual. WE cool dudes ... vella, as usual. He he. But the worst thing happened today. B and D's supervisor, Mr. ( Ya ) Ali called me in his "Chamber" and told me to stop wearing t shirts in company. Sould wear shirts from tomorrow. Crap. I brought just three shirts, all short length. What will become of me tomorrow!!! Only God can tell.
Well, i guess thats enough for today. Good nite!!
First Post
Hi there!! This is my first post. ME staying at cousins for training (which is hell by the way). Had to bunk entire saturday. Waise ME not good at writing. But trying my best.
